Things that make you go Hmmmm

all identity is in tension between the ways we know ourselves and the ways others know us: there's the identities we own for ourselves and there are the identities ascribed us by others. And generally the people who are busy being prejudiced against an identity aren't too worried as to whether or not you agree with the identity they're assigning... See more

Being wanted is very different than being valued and recognizing the difference is life changing work.

When I began to embrace selective silence—when I learned that I don't need to explain myself to everyone—I found something more powerful than expression. I found discernment in the spaces between words. I found boundaries in the power of pause. I found myself in the sanctuary of silence.

I don't over-explain myself as often now, nor chase after... See more

The American culture has two biases that border on taboos. One is the bias/taboo against dwelling on negatives. We're trained to respond with a positive statement: a reassurance, discounting the problem or voicing a solution.

The second is that every problem has a solution that's within reach of everyone. This manifests the "can do" spirit: if... See more

College isn’t insurance—It’s a nightclub. If colleges were normal businesses, with the entire world clamoring to get in, they’d increase enrollment. If they’re offering a great product, more people should benefit from it. But not universities. Because it's not about learning, it's about status.