self relationship & exploration

So how do you get that deep confidence that some people embody with seeming effortlessness, that seems so steady and stable that you know it’s real? It starts with learning to trust yourself.

Trusting yourself equals being your own best friend.

First, you possess imperfect knowledge of yourself. You may think you want something up until the moment you’ve attained it, only to discover that having is not so pleasing a thing as wanting .

Growing up, we turn to our parents, friends, teachers, and communities for guidance like our lives depend on it. Because it does. We have no idea yet how to live, how to learn, how to dress, how to be. Through being explicitly told what to do and implicitly observing what we should do, we learn to earn love and acceptance by living in accordance... See more

Many people, me included, ask the question ‘what is it like to be me’ surprisingly infrequently. Asking yourself this, a lot, can stop you from falling into a bunch of varieties of self-destruction, and lead you towards a more self-authored and less self-inflicted life.

The quest for self-discovery implies there is a prize ending; a time you’ll be able to breathe out a sigh of relief, or jump up and down with excitement, or throw a party, or in some way acknowledge that you’ve finally done it: you’ve discovered yourself. But in practice, the quest never ends, because fully knowing oneself is impossible. This... See more