misc.
Here is the thing about going around the world in a state of emotional openness and presence. Many people are hungry for that kind of attention. They might dream of getting it from a parent, or a mentor, or a lover, but might never receive it. Maybe never in their lives. And if you just walk up and give it to them, for free — but you aren’t... See more
My six stages of learning to be a socially normal person
this is literally what i did to Grisha… and i was aware about it
My guess is that you had a parent who was overbearing or punishing; that’s where these little subversive acts come from. The problem with adults who weren’t given space to explain their feelings or assert their needs as kids is we have a long history of grabbing what we need on the sly. The more complete your parents’ refusal to see you was, the... See more
‘I'm a Secret Stoner. Should I Confess?'
“Am I... a shit talker? Do I talk more shit than most? Do I pretend that what I’m good at is ANALYZING HUMANS when what I’m really good at is PROTECTING MYSELF FROM MY OWN SHAME?”
Should You Talk Less Shit?
There’s really no reason to study any footage of yourself, ever, unless you’re in the company of a voice coach or acting coach or publicist who is asking you to do so. You need to recognize that you can’t process your own image accurately. You look at footage and see a cringey monster. That’s not the way it looks to anyone else. We’re all like... See more
Heather Havrilesky • 'I'm a Rock Star in the Bathroom Mirror and a Malfunctioning Robot in Real Life!'
Many people are desperate to be listened to because so few people listen, so if you go around your life in a state of presence and openness, you will be treated like an oasis in the desert.
My six stages of learning to be a socially normal person
The brilliant fairy with long chartreuse locks of hair and elaborate gowns now wedged into the elevator shaft might inspire some potential friends but also repel others who are just as fit to love her, but fear her absolute explosion of emotions will engulf them in chaos and selfishness. She is not selfish — quite the opposite! — but they don’t... See more
How Open-Hearted Can You Be and Still Survive?
Don’t circumnavigate your fears. Feel them. That’s what I did after I posted my first very primitive song. I felt very afraid, so I started writing down how scared I was. And I kept writing: It’s fine to feel afraid. This won’t go away. It’s fine to feel humiliated. You can take it. It’s fine to be here, wanting everything to be safe again. You... See more