Relationships

the best relationships consist of a series of unbreachable private understandings

if you stand firmly on a self-lain foundation of patience and trust, someone crossing your boundaries is not so threatening. let them in. see what they do in your space. remove yourself if necessary.

You’ve been duped into thinking you can create a life without danger, one liberated from constraints and uncomfortable emotions, and that such a life is desirable. But you can’t, and it’s not. If you connect with someone and it comes with the risk of losing something, good. You’re alive!

My people are the whitepill people

The ones who try to find ways to support instead of tearing down

The ones who never make fun of others for the way they look or for their struggles

The ones who are kind to others (though sometimes they could be kinder to themselves)

ritualized, compulsive self-disclosure is not intimacy

it’s often a defense mechanism, one that masquerades as vulnerability but actually kills erotic charge, polarity, and mystery

shared experience, unspoken tension, and real-time attunement are the components of intimacy