Relationships

A big project of mine over the next year will be writing about cultural scripts and expectations in friendship. Friendship is vastly undertheorized as compared to romantic relationships, but they’re just as important: they affect our quality of life in the most fundamental ways. Friendship is an entry point to everything: work, romance, sense of... See more

Someone’s best qualities, through a squint, are just their flaws.

I heard someone say "don't cross oceans for people who wouldn't cross a puddle for you." Which I thought was good advice. But then someone else spoke up and said "No. Do it. Do cross oceans for people. Love all people. No conditions attached. No wondering whether or not they are worthy. Cross oceans, climb mountains. Life and love isn't about what... See more

“I wish I could say you get used to people dying. I never did. I don't want to. It tears a hole through me whenever somebody I love dies, no matter the circumstances. But I don't want it to "not matter." I don't want it to be something that just passes.

“My scars are a testament to the love and the relationship that I had for and with that person.

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The thing I’ve learned over time is that friendships are not fungible—no two people are the same, obviously, but also you can’t replicate the experience of someone knowing you through a particular era of your life. You can never go back to that period of your life; you can never replace the people who witnessed you and supported you. To me,... See more