Perfectionism is not a pathology
Most of my clients, and the parents of gifted children that I address at workshops and seminars, reveal that they are perfectionists. My first task is to help them see their perfectionism as a strength instead of as a weakness. I share with them the strong linkage between perfectionism and giftedness, and explain that it comes with the territory of
... See moreDr. Linda Silverman • Perfectionism: the Crucible of Giftedness
Operating under an illness model of care doesn’t just carry powerful implications for the way we conceptualize perfectionism, it impacts the way we conceptualize every aspect of mental health. The slightest pang of sadness, a drizzle of frustration—we register any decline in positive emotion with an assumption of pathology. It’s a cultural tic. The
... See moreKatherine Morgan Schafler • The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control
If there is such a thing as human perfection, it seems to emerge precisely from how we handle the imperfection that is everywhere, especially our own. – Richard Rohr
Perfection as we typically think about it should be treated more as a way to focus our attention rather than a final accomplishment that we attain.
Shannon Lee • Be Water, My Friend: The Teachings of Bruce Lee
Adler (1973) regarded perfectionism as an indispensable part of life, a striving to rise above feelings of dependency and helplessness. Understanding one’s personal power, for Adler, involved maximizing one’s abilities and using them for the good of society. Maslow (1971) equated the full realization of one’s potential with the absence of neurosis.
... See moreDr. Linda Silverman • Perfectionism: the Crucible of Giftedness
stage 1: try to defeat perfectionism thru sheer force of will
stage 2: try to heal perfectionism by doing a bunch of therapeutic inner child shit (also psychedelics)
stage 3: fully accept perfectionism, relate to it healthily, and watch it become a source of unimaginable power
procrastination is not a character defect; rather, it is an attempt—albeit an unsatisfactory one—at coping with the often incapacitating fear of having our worth held up for judgment.
Neil Fiore • The Now Habit: A Strategic Program for Overcoming Procrastination and Enjoying Guilt-Free Play
love-based perfectionism sounds like:
- "I want to make this better"
- "I can see how beautiful this could be"
- "it'd be even more fun if I could do it this way"
fear-based perfectionism sounds like:
- "I need to make this better"
- "I'm scared to put bad work into the world"
- "I'd finally feel relief... See more