loving the process

Nothing looks the way I thought it would look. Some of it has been more delightful than I expected, much of it has been more heartbreaking than I ever planned for — or thought I could survive. Yet here I am, living out the story that I am, at best, co-creating in collaboration with mysterious and invisible forces. It has been, at every turn, intere... See more

So I got my ass back into therapy. It was a slow, humiliating, expensive process, as the acquisition of self-awareness tends to be. All these heartbroken fascist wannabes are running around, yelling about how being “woke” is like some form of chemical castration. All it means is that you are becoming less of an asshole. That’s what therapy did for ... See more

We create our own reason to live, not a meaning to life. If life has no meaning, it is entirely up to us to determine how we want to live, what purpose we want to fulfill. As Jean Paul Sartre would put it, we define our existence by determining our own essence, or the things that make us us. It is also up to us to grapple with the terrors that come... See more

The only things I allow myself to feel regret about are past food, clothing, and hair choices. Everything else, I think of as part of my path, my journey. All the steps we’ve taken have led us to where we are. For some reason, in this culture, we always want to win, be right, comfortable, and happy. There is, however, tremendous value in losing, in... See more