recipes for love
The person who is best suited to us is not the person who shares our every taste (he or she doesn’t exist), but the person who can negotiate differences in taste intelligently — the person who is good at disagreement. Rather than some notional idea of perfect complementarity, it is the capacity to tolerate differences with generosity that is the
... See moreAlain De Botton • Why You Will Marry the Wrong Person
Regardless of what happens, our six weeks taught me that the deepest connections don’t come from trying to prove our worth, but from having the courage to be exactly who we are while trusting that we can be loved for it. They come from sharing pieces of our lives with someone without obligation, simply because we want to.
Like entangled particles,
... See moreCuriosity is the highest form of love, next to consideration.
I hold this to be the highest task of a bond between two people: that each should stand guard over the solitude of the other. For, if it lies in the nature of indifference and of the crowd to recognize no solitude, then love and friendship are there for the purpose of continually providing the opportunity for solitude.
www.themarginalian.org
“love rests on two pillars: surrender and autonomy” because “our need for togetherness exists alongside our need for separateness,” Rilke
www.themarginalian.org
Lasting love is vital because we know ourselves differently in relationships of constancy where we have witnessed change through time. We cannot really risk emotionally in relationships where we do not feel safe.
Commitment is the ground of our being that lets us make mistakes, be forgiven, and try again.
bell hooks • Communion
Love is a combination of care, commitment, knowledge, responsibility, respect, and trust.
bell hooks • Communion
To nurture us just one piece. Care.
Romance is different when two people approach each other from the space of knowledge rather than absolute mystery. No matter how well we get to know someone else, there is always a realm of mystery. Old ideas about romantic love taught females and males to believe that erotic tension depended on the absence of communication and understanding. This
... See morebell hooks • Communion
I spent years searching for a meaningful definition of the word “love,” and was deeply relieved when I found one in psychiatrist M. Scott Peck’s classic self-help book The Road Less Traveled, first published in 1978. Echoing the work of Erich Fromm, he defines love as “the will to extend one’s self for the purpose of nurturing one’s own or
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