Habits
sari and
Habits
"To thrive in our lifetimes — and not just survive — we need to transform our relationship with change, leaving behind rigidity and resistance in favor of a new nimbleness, a means of viewing more of what life throws at us as something to participate in, rather than fight. We are always shaping and being shaped by change, often at the very same time."
4 stages of habit formation
Noticing
Wanting
Doing
Liking
Stage 1. Noticing
Implementation Intentions
People don’t lack motivation they lack clarity
Give your goals a time and place to live in the world
The failure premortem
A quick exercise to notice what’s holding you back
It is six months from now. Imagine you have failed to achieve your most important goal. Write the story of how it happened. What caused it to fail?
Once you have this clarity, you can create ‘if, then’ plans to adjust for these challenges.
Stage 2. Wanting
Environments influence our desires
Often we want things simply because we see them as an option
You don’t have to be a victim of your environment, you can also be the architect and design your environment to make your good behaviours easier, your bad ones harder
Many of our desires are shaped because we have an environment that shapes us that way
Stage 3. Doing
Hone in on the skill
Any outcome is just a point along the spectrum of repetitions
The more reps you put in, the more likely you are to achieve that goal
Optimise for the starting line, not the finish line
If you make it as easy as possible to get started and get your reps in, often the outcome comes as a natural result
Stage 4. Liking
Only reason we repeat behaviours is because we enjoy the reward
Good habits have delayed consequences so:
Need to figure out ways to bring in a reward to the present moment
The best way to change long term behaviour is with short term feedback
The more evidence we have of a belief, the more likely we are to believe it
The actions that you take provide evidence of who you are
Every action is a vote for the type of person you wish to become
If you take a new action and begin to accumulate evidence for that belief about yourself, the more votes you get the more likely you are to win the election
True change is Identity changeGoal is not to read a book, the goal is to become a reader
The goal is not to run a marathon, the goal is to become a runner
The goal is not to write a book, the goal is to become a writer
The goal is to become a type of person, to develop an identity
The way to being something or becoming someone is through doing something
Every time you practice an action, you are being a desired identity.