Friends and family
Being a better friend, coping with idiosyncrasies of family, relationships
Friends and family
People do well if they CAN do well. If they can they will. If they could they would.
This is in contrast to the notion that people do well when they WANT to.
It’s a skill problem rather than a will problem
The key to successful relationships is to stop keeping score and instead focus on being the partner you aspire to be.
TRANSCRIPT
The second is, and this is kind of the most important, is, and I didn't learn this, and this was the biggest unlock, I think, for me in terms of my relationships with my partner and my friends and my parents, was to put away the scorecard.
And that is, relationships are a transaction to a certain extent. You might be providing economic security
... See moreMajor cheat code in life: Be the one who reaches out. Text first. Call first. Plan first. Initialize first. Most people wait to be chosen. Be the chooser. Connection requires initiative. Friendship requires effort. Love requires action. Stop waiting to be picked. Start picking. Initiative is attractive.
Scott D. Clarysubstack.comOn being the first one
Personal importance, or
taking things personally, is the maximum expression of selfishness because
we make the assumption that everything is about ‘me’,” he wrote. “Noth-
ing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves. All
people live in their own dream, in their own mind; they are in a completely
different world from the one we live... See more
taking things personally, is the maximum expression of selfishness because
we make the assumption that everything is about ‘me’,” he wrote. “Noth-
ing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves. All
people live in their own dream, in their own mind; they are in a completely
different world from the one we live... See more
Taking offence
Any skill or attribute you claim makes you unique—”I’m really funny”, “I’m good at shining shoes”, “I’m an attentive lover”—you can always find someone else better than you on that dimension. They’re funnier, fitter, richer, sexier, smarter, or better at shining shoes than you are. We can’t help but desperately compete in this unwinnable game of... See more
billmei.net • Friendships Form via Shared Context, Not Shared Activities
you might stress over Christmas traditions like putting up fairy lights 🎄in the exact perfect arrangement, but your partner might think, Why are we doing this? The kids will just knock them over anyway😧 . To them, it’s not about being lazy; it’s about not seeing the point.
