Help create systems instead of goals, and show kids that they can keep exploring, finding linkages in hidden spaces. “Teach kids freedom, and that they have agency.”
But because adults conceal their flaws, and at the same time insist on high standards of behavior for kids, a lot of kids grow up feeling they fall hopelessly short. They walk around feeling horribly evil for having used a swearword, while in fact most of the adults around them are doing much worse things.