Parenting and family stuff
good stuff from around the internet on raising good kids, building a family, etc.
sari and
Parenting and family stuff
fwiw I'm now quite enjoying having a baby, thanks to some mix of:
- baby is older and more active (almost crawling)
- attitude shifts on my part (nothing fancy, just getting more curious about skill-development - baby's and mine)
- getting 👇 off my chest helped me reorient
Malcolm Ocean x.comthread plus embedded thread
The questions from the article:
“What did you learn today?” vs. “What did you disagree with today?”
“What did you accomplish this week?” vs. “What did you fail at this week?”
“Here’s how you do that.” vs. “How would you solve this problem?”
“Here’s your new kindergarten” vs. “What kindergarten do you want to attend?”
“That’s just the way it is.” vs. “Great question. Why don’t you figure out the answer?”
“You can’t do that.” vs. “What would it take to do that?”
“Did you make a new friend today?” vs. “How did you help someone today?”
Parents think they can hand children permanent confidence—like a gift—by praising their brains and talent. It doesn’t work, and in fact has the opposite effect. It makes children doubt themselves as soon as anything is hard or anything goes wrong. If parents want to give their children a gift, the best thing they can do is to teach their children... See more
Carol Dweck • Mindset: The New Psychology of Success
In the mid-1990s, Dr. Marshall Duke and Dr. Robyn Fivush developed a measure called “Do You Know?” It had a series of 20 questions, including: Do you know where your grandparents grew up? Do you know where your mom and dad went to high school? Do you know where your parents met? Do you know an illness or something terrible that happened in your family? Do you know the story of your birth? It turned out that having the answers to these questions was the single best predictor of children’s emotional health and happiness. Children who know more about their families tend to do better when they face challenges, be more resilient, and moderate the effects of stress. Our family’s story—our history—is linked to our own personal identity and knowing that we belong to a larger family. “Children who have the most self-confidence have . . . a strong 'intergenerational self.’ They know they belong to something bigger than themselves,” said Dr. Duke…
The Coddling of the American Mind: How Good Intentions and Bad Ideas Are Setting Up a Generation for Failure
Jonathan Haidt • 1 highlight
amazon.com
(One of my favorite pieces of parenting advice: You have to give yourself what you needed when you were a kid, and give your kids what they need now.)
Austin Kleon • The Way You Wanted to Feel
“Parenting is a relationship. It’s not a set of strategies.”
Farnam Street • Dr. Laura Markham: Peaceful Parenting [The Knowledge Project Ep. #52]
sari and