everything is a conversation

“People listen better if they feel that you have understood them. They tend to think that those who understand them are intelligent and sympathetic people whose own opinions may be worth listening to. So if you want the other side to appreciate your interests, begin by demonstrating that you appreciate theirs.”

― Roger Fisher, Getting to Yes:

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Humans aren’t meant to excavate their inner feelings until they find their “true self.” We become ourselves in relation, not through introspection.

good sex is just a conversation that doesn't require words

conversations are coordination games but with social capital. if neither person is willing to risk any status loss by showing their cards, you end up in an awkward small talk deadlock that's most always worse for both parties

If we don’t know how to mourn and rebuild, we are incentivized to keep the storms of our lives raging indefinitely.

Staying locked in an eternal battle against the world is a good way to distract ourselves from the incredible vulnerability of existing within it.

How can I find worth and dignity in something deeper and more enduring than intelligence?

There is no way of getting it perfect. There is no complete, no finish line, no done. There is simply “What’s the next experiment?” There is only play.

The technique of merging rests upon the rock of gentleness. When we are gentle towards others, it does not mean that we allow them to walk all over us. It simply means that when we decide to take a stand in anything, we do so with respect towards others. By adding a soft touch to our daily doings, we create curves where there are hard edges and we

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