dont like this

When the upset partner realizes they caused hurt they try to retract their rejection and accept, because accepting the sex in order to comfort their partner would not be creating a burden or earn resentment, but now it’s too late and the wounded partner lashes out with their own secondary rejection.

Consider, for instance, the many ways in which hostility between partners regularly interferes with sexual arousal and performance. It’s probably universal that when our partner is hostile, we feel rejected and vice versa. Intimate relationships sensitize people to rejection, and rejections regularly occur in most intimate relationships.

Rather than stating their own need for intimacy, each partner has tried offering sex to the other as a means of making up when their partner seems upset at them.