CPTSD

REACTIVE ABUSE Is when someone pushes you until you act out of character. Then, they shame you for your reaction. If you hold a match to a candle, sooner or later, it will start to burn.

In a dysfunctional family abuse is acceptable. It's the talking about it that's not.

People don't get what it means to be a kid in survival mode. While some are building social skills, these kids are building defenses. As adults, some are building families, while child survivors are building what they never had to begin with. Peace to all who know this pain.

It's common for complex trauma survivors to feel a little panicky when we feel we're not being listened to or not being perceived or understood accurately. Our nervous system was molded by experiences of being functionally invisible-- & that invisibility leading to pain & shame.

the secret to being a private person is to overshare dumb shit so people think you are an open book but then not tell them any of the important details of your life

When a person starts healing after living in survival mode, they have a deep desire for honesty & authenticity. They’ve had to fight for their ability to think clearly & know who they are. It’s been quite costly. They’re not willing to engage with those who won’t respect that.

No one is all good or all bad. If someone pushes your buttons, you choose to only see the bad. If someone makes you feel good, you choose to only see the good. We all contain multitudes though, and I refuse to stop seeing the complexity in my fellow humans.

Something trauma survivors rarely acknowledge to others is how triggering criticism-- legitimate or superficial-- can be to us. Not because we're "thin skinned," but because it can trigger frustrating, embarrassing emotional flashbacks to feeling powerless & incompetent.