my sense is that people who take a long time to respond to messages, or tend to go into shame spirals about them, often put a lot of pressure on themselves to respond in a specific way
I just got some (personally) mindblowing advice, re: a message that felt overdue:
You don't have to explain yourself.
Say, '"Thanks for your patience; it took longer than I expected to get back to you."
and then move on with it!
🤯