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“Every marriage is made up of two ingredients, togetherness and separateness. In good marriages, the partners carry equal loads of both of those. Let’s say there are 100 points of togetherness and 100 points of separateness. In a good relationship, one partner expresses 50 points of togetherness and 50 points of separateness, and the other does the
... See moreJohn Townsend • Boundaries: When To Say Yes, How to Say No: When to Say Yes, When to Say No, to Take Control of Your Life
“Corrie,” he began instead, “do you know what hurts so very much? It’s love. Love is the strongest force in the world, and when it is blocked that means pain.
John Sherrill • The Hiding Place
The family is the social unit God invented to fill up the world with representatives of his loving character. It’s a place for nurturing and developing babies until they’re mature enough to go out of the family as adults and to multiply his image in other surroundings.
John Townsend • Boundaries: When To Say Yes, How to Say No: When to Say Yes, When to Say No, to Take Control of Your Life
Shame begets shame.
John Bradshaw • Healing the Shame That Binds You
One of the most devastating effects of trauma is that people’s biology changes into a biology of threat; this is expressed on multiple levels, in stress hormones, immunology and what the brain selects to pay attention to. The intrinsic reward system changes, as do “attractors”—what turns you on or leaves you cold. As a consequence, traumatized... See more
Bessel Van Der Kolk, M.D. • The Body Keeps The Score
introverts prefer to work independently, and solitude can be a catalyst to innovation
Susan Cain • Quiet
They think he is progressing now, because he is picking up new things. Picking up new things is not the way to progress, any more than picking up grass by the roots is the way to make it grow.
G. K. Chesterton • The G. K. Chesterton Collection [50 Books]
One woman’s life was changed when she realized that she could say, “I will not allow myself to be yelled at. I will go into the other room until you decide you can talk about this without attacking me. When you can do that, I will talk to you.”
John Townsend • Boundaries: When To Say Yes, How to Say No: When to Say Yes, When to Say No, to Take Control of Your Life
Writer and activist James Baldwin on the power of reading:
“You think your pain and your heartbreak are unprecedented in the history of the world, but then you read. It was Dostoevsky and Dickens who taught me that the things that tormented me most were the very things that connected me with all the people who were alive, or who ever had been alive.... See more
“You think your pain and your heartbreak are unprecedented in the history of the world, but then you read. It was Dostoevsky and Dickens who taught me that the things that tormented me most were the very things that connected me with all the people who were alive, or who ever had been alive.... See more