But things were easier when I could do with any kind of love as long as it would authenticate that I’m loveable, and when seeking to feel understood was a prerogative far more important than understanding myself. Now that I need no confirmation or salvation, the company I want is hard to find, the love I crave is hard to keep. Rare. When... See more

I’ve been warned this is what growing up feels like, nonlinear and itchy like a hand-me-down sweater, when the parts of you that have met their potential are digging into the parts that haven’t, behaviors you keep indulging in clash against the moral goodness you know to be right. Either way, it’s all you, amorphous, hypocritical, sleazy creature... See more