I’m a conversion therapy survivor. The therapy itself was its own layer of psychological trauma that I still work through twenty years later. My therapist recently commented “I want to be careful not to ever hurt you because of your past experience with traumatic therapy.” I confidently (and kindly) looked him directly in his eyes and said “You don’t ever have to worry about that. There is no therapist whose opinion I trust more than my own.” It took years to understand that we are equals in therapy. If ever you feel like the professional lacks understanding or compassion for you, please don’t go back. The biggest red flag is when a therapist wants power over you, rather than you being empowered.
What Could a Masculinity Expert Teach Me About My Marriage? Everything. - The New York Times
Daniel Oppenheimernytimes.com
I genuinely thanked her for her feedback, and I’ve tried ever since not to tell my patients that they should not feel the way they do. Kathy taught me that my responsibility goes much deeper: I have to help them reconstruct their inner map of the world.
Bessel van der Kolk • The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma
