Willpower Doesn't Work: Discover the Hidden Keys to Success

The best thing you can do is see people as you see yourself. You can change. You have infinite potential and flexibility, as do other people. Treat them that way. Love them, regardless of whether they violate your personal rules. Then dedicate the rest of your life to becoming the type of person who can reshape the rules of their environment, so th

From so many different perspectives, I’m completely confident that willpower is not an effective approach to personal change. Spiritually, I’d rather rely on my higher power than my own power. Motivationally, I’d rather rely on WHY power than willpower. And behaviorally, I’d rather outsource my willpower to a goal-enriching environment.

You could not be where you are without the challenges you’ve faced, the mentors you’ve had, and all the many people who have created the world you live in. When you believe you are the sole cause of your success, you commit what psychologists call the fundamental attribution error. You attribute your success to yourself. No. Your success, in the wa

This entire approach to learning and growth is experiential, not theoretical. Rather than having all the answers, you want just enough information to move forward. The fastest way to get relevant information is through failure and real-world experience. Your environment for success can’t be a classroom or a therapy couch. It has to be in the trench

The moment you jump in with full commitment, you will realize it was much easier than you formulated in your mind. You will begin to adapt. But in order to do so, you’ll need faith that you can do this, and you’ll need to be a flexible learner. Even still, it will not be smooth sailing. Although exposing yourself directly is the fastest and most pr

Write down your if-then responses to all of the obstacles you imagined. Write the conditions in which you will absolutely quit.

It is only by going through difficult and challenging experiences that you can evolve. If you constantly avoid pain and mask your emotions, you’ll never grow.

Ancient philosophies such as stoicism and spiritual beliefs such as Buddhism and Christianity fundamentally oppose a hedonistic approach to life. Embracing challenges, pain, and difficulty are among the primary paths to meaning and growth according to these perspectives.

What was right yesterday may no longer be right today. You’re adaptive but purposeful. Thus, like the authoring self, you have a map of where you want to go, but you’re open to having that map modified, expanded, and possibly redirected entirely with better information. Rather than obsessing about a particular outcome, you expect the best outcome t