Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before?
Another way to get distance from those thoughts, and my personal favourite, is to write them down. This is not exclusive to anxious thoughts. Any time that you want to get some distance and a new perspective on your emotional state or situation, write down everything you are thinking and feeling. Seeing what you have written on the page can be a
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Thoughts are not facts. They are guesses, stories, memories, ideas and theories. They are a construct offered to you by your brain as one potential explanation for the sensations you are experiencing right now. We know they are not facts because they are so heavily influenced by your physical state (hormones, blood pressure, heart rate, digestion,
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Fear is a part of our survival response. It is supposed to be intensely uncomfortable, and the urges to escape and then avoid the feared situation are supposed to be strong.
Julie Smith • Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before?
Keeping journals, going to a therapist or talking to friends can all help us to reflect on ourselves and our experience in a way that enables us to learn more about who we are and why we do what we do. Self-acceptance involves listening to our own needs and meeting them. If we are not paying attention, we don’t always pick up on the signs.
Julie Smith • Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before?
To build self-acceptance we first need to understand who we are and who we want to be. That comes from practising self-awareness. We become self-aware through self-reflection.
Julie Smith • Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before?
Sounds simple, but many people go through life without much in the way of examining their own patterns of behaviour that impact on their experience of life.
Julie Smith • Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before?
If we know that thoughts and feelings are not facts but they are causing us distress, it makes sense to check it out and see whether it is a true reflection of reality or whether an alternative would be more helpful. When we treat our current thoughts and emotions as facts, we allow them to determine our thoughts and actions of the future. Then
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Emotions are real and valid, but they are not facts. They are a guess. A perspective that we try on for size. An emotion is the brain’s attempt to make sense of the world so that you can meet your needs and survive. Given that what you feel is not a factual statement, neither are thoughts.
Julie Smith • Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before?
Journalling in this way can feel strange if we are used to glossing over things without paying too much attention to the details.