It helps me because every day there are contractions of frustration, of anxiety, of wanting to yell, of giving in to yelling, of wanting to run away, of being brave when my son is scared even though I am scared, of comforting him even though I feel I have nothing to give. Drinking has been my ongoing epidural because being a mother involves, in so

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But the issue of children and who looks after them has become, in my view, profoundly political, and so it would be a contradiction to write a book about motherhood without explaining to some degree how I found the time to write it. For the first six months of Albertine’s life I looked after her at home while my partner continued to work. This exp

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I want to go somewhere and see something or do or feel something beautiful, but I feel trapped. Asher needs and wants me at night. I can’t leave. I walk in my circles in the morning and try to focus on the mountains and not the fence. Every night I look at Buster and I can’t help but think it’s not going well in there. Maybe this was a kid museum s

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