Understanding Others' Emotions | Lisa Feldman Barrett

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“Do you want to vent or do you want advice?” Just learning now, after 40 years on earth, that this might be the most important question to ask whenever a friend or loved one is upset.

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Luckily, the fix is easy: Simply ask her what she needs. Does she want you to connect with her and provide an empathetic ear, or is she looking for your opinion?

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Imagine yourself in your counterpart’s situation. The beauty of empathy is that it doesn’t demand that you agree with the other person’s ideas (you may well find them crazy). But by acknowledging the other person’s situation, you immediately convey that you are listening. And once they know that you are listening, they may tell you something that y

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Shawn T. Smith • The Tactical Guide to Women: How Men Can Manage Risk in Dating and Marriage

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