“And this is something you’ve told me. You told me change is hard for you to adjust to. That you need a little time. I always thought of it in the sense of travel, and that was dumb.” “It’s not dumb,” I whisper. “We’re just learning.”

I stop crying long enough for Oliver to coax me outside for a walk where he then proceeds to buy me food from every vendor I look twice at. This gorgeous angel has really cracked my love language.

“It does,” Oliver says. “Speaking of, do you want help organizing…” He gestures vaguely at the chaos of my stuff around us. “My, my, Oliver. You certainly know how to make a girl swoon,” I say, fanning myself.

“You kissed me!” she screeches. “No, I didn’t.” “Yes, you did!” “No, I—” “Do it again,” Tilly says, reaching out and fisting her hands in my shirt, pulling me toward her like I have any power to resist. When it comes to Tilly, I’m the tide and she’s the moon; I go wherever she wants me.

“Being planless and pantsless are my two favorite states of being.”

He repeats the movement like now that he knows what it feels like to touch me, he can’t stop.

Like, as still as I wish I could have been two minutes ago so he wouldn’t have asked me what was wrong and I wouldn’t have OPENED MY GIANT MOUTH AND SAID WHAT I JUST SAID.

Realizing the longer I hide out in the bathroom, the greater the chance he’ll think I’m pooping, I flick off the lights and step out.

One. Bed.