It’s deeply poignant that we should expend so much effort on trying to look strong before the world when, all the while, it’s really only ever the revelation of the somewhat embarrassing, sad, melancholy, and anxious bits of us that renders us endearing to others and transforms strangers into friends.

you can see that the truly charming people don’t draw you in by dazzling or blinding you with their looks, money, achievement — they do it by stripping away your pressure to perform, laying a blanket of ease with your humanity with humor, honesty, or untethered simplicity

You have to actually like people, be present, and set down whatever stands between you and vibrant, pulsing reality. It's a lot more like practicing how to free fall than learning how to act in a movie.