updated 1d ago
The Way of Integrity: Finding the Path to Your True Self
You won’t catch wild animals pouring their energy into such random activities. Some creatures compete for food, territory, and mates. Many love to play, and seem to enjoy their mock victories. But they don’t pull out their own hair and feathers if they fail to accrue a billion times as much birdseed or dead rabbits as the next sparrow or coyote. Mo
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Maria Potoroczyn added 7mo ago
It means that once you’ve recognized a real soul guide, you may be tempted to latch on to that person’s teachings like a baby sloth. The problem is that reality is too vast and intricate to be fully represented by one person, one set of ideas, or indeed all people and ideas combined. The idea of “killing the Buddha” means learning all you can from
... See morefrom The Way of Integrity: Finding the Path to Your True Self by Martha Beck
Maria Potoroczyn added 7mo ago
This violates what psychiatrist Alice Miller calls the cardinal rule of all cultures: DON’T EVER MENTION THE RULES. In other words, never articulate that there’s an unspoken code everyone in the room has been trained to follow.
from The Way of Integrity: Finding the Path to Your True Self by Martha Beck
Maria Potoroczyn added 7mo ago
Our worst psychological suffering comes from thoughts that we genuinely believe, while simultaneously knowing they aren’t true.
from The Way of Integrity: Finding the Path to Your True Self by Martha Beck
Maria Potoroczyn added 7mo ago
The surge of pleasure our egos get from attacking others is a great emotional painkiller.
from The Way of Integrity: Finding the Path to Your True Self by Martha Beck
Maria Potoroczyn added 7mo ago
I launched my first “integrity cleanse.” On New Year’s Eve, I made a resolution not to tell a single lie, of any kind, for the next full calendar year. This turned out to be a quick trip out of self-righteousness and into a clearer mind. If you ever want to try it, you can count on freeing yourself from innumerable errors. But you should also expec
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Maria Potoroczyn added 7mo ago
One study showed that people who present “an idealized image of themselves” had higher blood pressure and heart rates; greater hormonal reactions to stress; elevated cortisol, glucose, and cholesterol levels; and reduced immune-system functioning. Lying and keeping secrets have been linked to heart disease, certain cancers, and a host of emotional
... See morefrom The Way of Integrity: Finding the Path to Your True Self by Martha Beck
Maria Potoroczyn added 7mo ago
All their cheating, all their fudging, all their repressing, all their fraud and betrayal, is driven by some version of one single lie: I am not loved. You may phrase this thought a little differently. Maybe for you, the deepest lie is “I’m defective,” “No one wants me,” “I have no community,” “I don’t fit in anywhere,” or any of a thousand other v
... See morefrom The Way of Integrity: Finding the Path to Your True Self by Martha Beck
Maria Potoroczyn added 7mo ago
In the last chapter, I asked you to think about the times, places, and relationships where you noticed yourself lying or behaving inauthentically. What would happen in these situations if you began saying exactly what you really think and doing exactly what you really want? Take
from The Way of Integrity: Finding the Path to Your True Self by Martha Beck
Maria Potoroczyn added 7mo ago