The Rabbit Hole 🕳🐇 issue no.47

I almost quit this work professionally. Not because I had fallen out of love with Tantra. Not because I had lost faith in my work. But because the “spiritual world” had started to feel like another marketplace... a stage built for a certain kind of noise, a particular kind of aesthetic, a performance I didn’t know how to master. No matter how hard I tried, it felt tiring and unexciting. I asked mentors. I asked artists I admired. I searched for a map, a formula, a new light. But no one could give it to me. Because answers don’t come from outside. They rise from your intensity and your silence when you finally stop asking. Around January this year, I hit that place… The bottom where you’re too tired to pretend anymore. I call it my Buddha moment. :) In that phase of nothingness, I asked the little CB: “What do I do?” He instantly replied… “Why can’t you weave Tantra, music, and cinema into your writing?” “Why can’t you just do what makes you feel alive?” It felt absurd to my mind to blend Tantra and cinema. What kind of spiritual guidance is that..!? But the heart said: It’s obvious. Because that’s all I know. That’s what I love. So, I took a deep breath and committed. To write daily. To blend the wildness of cinema, the devotion of music, and the timelessness of Tantra. And something shifted. Not because I cracked some marketing code. Not because I studied new algorithms. But because I started writing to belong to myself again. Three months later… 150,000+ misfits and wild souls have joined here. People I grew up admiring - writers, artists, filmmakers - send me DMs and emails applauding the work. But numbers aren’t the miracle. The miracle is the mornings I wake up: with words buzzing in my blood, music playing in my heart (and on Spotify), and the feeling that somewhere the little CB is smiling. Knowing he didn’t betray the boy who once fearlessly loved his stories. My point is: Start now, please. 🙏🏽 The world doesn’t need your polished performance. The world needs the voice you were once afraid to share. I’m rooting for you. 🌹🦁