I am routinely asked for the Right Way to stand, talk, gesture, or present. In fact, there is no Right Way. How you should stand, talk, gesture, or present depends on what you want to communicate. Anything else erodes authenticity—and for many people, confidence as well.

When I address these top executives, I introduce the concept of the red blinking light. When a leader walks into a room, it’s as though a red blinking light is flashing a message: “This is important!” When the CEO goes into a meeting, the importance of that meeting rises. If he decides to skip a meeting, its importance is reduced. Leaders have to b

The kind of presence that attracts other people to you, makes your team want to move mountains for you, and propels you ahead is the opposite of fake. It is pure authenticity—being more of the person you already are, without the mental subterfuge that gets in the way.

In general, it’s not the pause we notice as much as the speaker’s reaction to her own pause. I’ve seen magnetic presenters make prolonged pauses look entirely deliberate.

Determine Your Personal Presence Brand

As you develop your mental aim, you also need to determine what conversation is currently in your head and how it may need to change. Even when you aren’t paying attention, your internal conversation is always happening.

I define having an intentional presence as understanding how you want to be perceived and subsequently communicating in a manner so that you will be perceived the way you want. It means aligning your thoughts with your words and actions. And it requires a keen understanding of your true, authentic self, as well as your impact on others.

Key Takeaways from Chapter 1 1.Being intentional about your presence is similar to having an athlete’s mental focus. 2.Uncover any negative thoughts you have about your presence that are getting in your way. Know what’s playing just below your consciousness. 3.Set a positive intention for the kind of presence you want to convey overall. That’s your

a great piece of wisdom: When someone says something unkind to you, it’s more about that person than it is about you.