The Power of Presence: Unlock Your Potential to Influence and Engage Others

People are being asked to strengthen the way they communicate and connect with others to increase their influence in looser and more disparate corporate structures.

a great piece of wisdom: When someone says something unkind to you, it’s more about that person than it is about you.

Accept the feeling. Dwell on it for a moment. Perhaps even name it: “There’s my crazy telltale heart again.” But don’t conclude that it will make you unsuccessful.

One of the overarching messages of this research is that by focusing attention on what’s right rather than what’s wrong, and learning how to be resilient against negativity, we can guard ourselves against protracted setbacks and live a happier, more fulfilling life.

As you develop your mental aim, you also need to determine what conversation is currently in your head and how it may need to change. Even when you aren’t paying attention, your internal conversation is always happening.

In general, it’s not the pause we notice as much as the speaker’s reaction to her own pause. I’ve seen magnetic presenters make prolonged pauses look entirely deliberate.

For most people, it means you have to make choices about the actions you want to emphasize. The best place to start is by choosing the actions that make up your core values or, in other words, your personal presence brand.

“The face isn’t a secondary billboard for internal feelings but an equal partner in the emotional process.”4

The best way to improve your body language is to focus on your intention and make sure your body carries that message as well. (How you dress also counts as a form of nonverbal communication, with a similar need for alignment. See the sidebar for tips on how dress, as physical expression, can strengthen your presence.)