the paradox of craving to be seen but fearing being known
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the paradox of craving to be seen but fearing being known
intimacy with others necessarily includes facing yourself, reckoning with what you truly desire, humbling yourself, noticing your bad habits, and observing your defense mechanisms. You have to be able to admit the many, many ways you fuck up and blame others and distance yourself every day in order to be a good friend to another flawed human being.... See more
Talking about friendship with Heather Havrilesky
Lately I’ve been looking closely at how fear of not belonging ties me to patterns of domination. When I feel unsure about myself or someone else, I can devolve into my patterns of “know-it-allness” (spell check initially corrected “allness” to “illness” . . . apt). When my know-it-all self shows up, I use my intellect to soothe my feelings of isola
... See moreSebene Selassie • You Belong: A Call for Connection
But by hiding your hurt, pain, fears, and insecurity from others, you exist in the world inauthentically.