The Lengths We Go To Avoid Love
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The Lengths We Go To Avoid Love
Saved by Jaime
What emerges time and again are portraits of people who desperately crave love and want to keep their relationships intact at any cost, but their fear sabotages any attempt at intimacy and is causing their relationships to fail. They struggle to engage with hobbies because they never believe their work is of any worth.
very feelings prevent us from finding love. Researchers at the University of Toronto found through a series of studies that when we’re afraid of being single, we’re more likely to settle for less satisfying relationships.
Being so anxiously attached (or avoidant) we can never relax and end up sabotaging every relationship?
Sometimes, we sabotage our relationships because what we really want is to find ourselves, though we are afraid to be alone.
Many of us have learned to run from closeness rather than take the risks involved. We run from love or prevent closeness in many ways. We push people away or do hurtful things to them so they won’t want to be close to us. We do ridiculous things in our minds to talk ourselves out of wanting to be close. We find fault with everyone we meet; we rejec
... See moreMelanie Levitin and added
Afflicted by a lack of self-love, romantic relationships become almost impossible, for one of the central requirements of a capacity to accept the love of another turns out to be a confident degree of affection for ourselves, built up over the years, largely in childhood.
So many of us long for love but lack the courage to take risks. Even though we are obsessed with the idea of love, the truth is that most of us live relatively decent, somewhat satisfying lives even if we often feel that love is lacking. In these relationships we share genuine affection and/or care. For most of us, that feels like enough because it
... See moreWe know that everyone wants to be loved, but some people have given up hope of finding or showing it.