We can’t eliminate them, but we can get better and better at consciously noticing these old patterns and responding effectively when they occur. In the Acknowledge phase of dropping anchor, we might say, “Here’s some old programming showing up” or “Here’s that old pattern again.”

then a documentary about you is not you. And no matter what shows up in that documentary, whether it’s false or true, positive or negative, ancient or recent, facts or opinions, memories or predictions…the documentary will never be you. That documentary is nothing more or less than an elaborate construction of thoughts, images, and memories (and al

So we also need self-compassion: acknowledging how hard and painful it is to be human;

four HARD barriers: Hooked, Avoiding discomfort, Remoteness from values, and Doubtful goals.

In summary then, we are all hardwired to suffer psychologically: to compare, evaluate, and criticize ourselves; to focus on what we’re lacking; to rapidly become dissatisfied with what we have; and to imagine all sorts of frightening scenarios, most of which will never happen. No wonder humans find it hard to be happy! But to make matters worse, ma

Every day offers a wealth of opportunities to appreciate the world we live in. Practicing your focusing and savoring skills will help you make the most of your life right now, even as you’re taking action to change it for the better.

All you need do is pick one or two values every day and look for opportunities to “sprinkle” them into your activities.

“I’m noticing obsessing” or “There’s my mind ruminating.” Or you might prefer to drop phrases like “I’m noticing”

But more and more, through being present and opening up (dropping anchor, noticing and naming, making room, self-compassion, focusing and refocusing, savoring and appreciating, etc.) we can overcome such barriers and do what it takes to build a better life.