The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are

fitting in and belonging are not the same thing, and, in fact, fitting in gets in the way of belonging.

When we start polling people, it’s often because we don’t trust our own knowing. It feels too shaky and too uncertain. We want assurances and folks with whom we can share the blame if things don’t pan out. I know all about this. I’m a professional pollster—it’s hard for me to go it alone sometimes. When I’m making a difficult decision and feel disc

Spirituality is recognizing and celebrating that we are all inextricably connected to each other by a power greater than all of us, and that our connection to that power and to one another is grounded in love and compassion. Practicing spirituality brings a sense of perspective, meaning, and purpose to our lives.

(Jean Kilbourne’s latest DVD is Killing Us Softly 4,6 and Katz’s DVD is titled Tough Guise: Violence, Media, and the Crisis in Masculinity.7)

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.

If what matters to us is what we’re concerned about, then play and rest is important. If what matters to us is what other people think or say or value, then it’s back to exhaustion and producing for self-worth.

I encourage you to sit down and make a list of the specific conditions that are in place when everything feels good in your life. Then check that list against your to-do list and your to-accomplish list.

Because true belonging only happens when we present our authentic, imperfect selves to the world, our sense of belonging can never be greater than our level of self-acceptance.

In the long run, work does not work without play.”2

If we stop long enough to create a quiet emotional clearing, the truth of our lives will invariably catch up with us.