I know now I was grieving something , the death of an ambition. I started attending reading events at Green Apple Books, my local bookstore, because it was something I liked in grad school, and I had to get myself out of the house. Going to those events was (is) a way of traveling without moving; they have afforded me an incredibly valuable... See more

There are moments when I think Sunny’s first year went by fast, then I stumble across an old photo or text and my perception of those early months unfolds like an accordion and I’m stunned to recall the depth and variety of experiences I underwent, the majority of which have now been lost to me, and which may be recalled only in bits and pieces... See more

That is all we have, this moment with the world. It will not last, because nothing lasts. Entropy, mortality, extinction: the entire plan of the universe consists of losing, and no matter how much we find along the way, life amounts to a reverse savings account in which we are eventually robbed of everything. Our dreams and plans and jobs and knees... See more

Nothing looks the way I thought it would look. Some of it has been more delightful than I expected, much of it has been more heartbreaking than I ever planned for — or thought I could survive. Yet here I am, living out the story that I am, at best, co-creating in collaboration with mysterious and invisible forces. It has been, at every turn,... See more

Eventually, with the restaurant about to close and reality setting in, I begin to pack my things. I put on my coat, stuff my journal and pen back into my messenger bag, and empty out my tray above the garbage can. The thoughts begin to cascade: the irony of this happening right now is so painfully clear, how could I have been so naive in this city,... See more