Developing self-sabotage triggers is somewhat natural and inevitable, because we are constantly trying to balance the two goals of attaining rewards and avoiding threat, and sometimes we overprioritize threat when we probably don’t need to.

Mind Reading arises from a misguided attempt at self-protection. You believe that if you know what others are thinking, then you can predict and be prepared for how they will act toward you.

Confirmation bias

you may find yourself experiencing a pattern of early, strong pursuit (approach) followed by waning motivation and effort (avoidance),

Exercise: Thought Record A Thought Record is a visual way to represent your thinking as it occurs in specific situations and events to allow you to see in real time how your thinking affects your feelings and behaviors. It is a classic Cognitive Behavior Therapy tool first created by Dr. Aaron Beck,

Exercise: Physicalize the Emotion Intense negative feelings can make you feel out of control, and this is one of my favorite exercises to help regain control and feel mastery over circumstances and environment. We all need that feeling to some degree in order to feel safe, which is the basis for any type of self-actualizing pursuits and allows us

It takes some effort to realize this might be the culprit in your self-sabotage, because it usually involves doing nothing different,

Our minds strive for cognitive consonance. We want to achieve harmony between thoughts and actions, and hate cognitive dissonance, which occurs when we think one way and act another.

Knowing where triggers arise will help you to be able to intervene and stop the self-sabotage. As you look at this chain it’s clear that thoughts direct our feelings, which prompt our actions. For example, if you think someone is a reckless jerk for cutting you off on the highway, that thought will bring up feelings of irritation or even outrage