what they need from you is usually just a quick connection, rather than a critique or complement.

Nobody gets to skip the soul fevers and growing pains of life. In order to learn who they are, and what feels right to them, a child must grapple with these emotional upsets.

Rituals loosen a younger child’s grip, relaxing their need to control small and seemingly random aspects of their day.

The “little buddy parent” (which morphs, as a child gets older, into the “best friend parent”) sees no separation between their world—their adult conversations and activities—and their children’s.

These sorts of “advance notices” can help increase security and ease.

With stories they have an arena for their own feelings and questions, a place to process the truth through their imaginations.

parent with a sense of strength and openness, and perhaps most of all, a sense of humor.

Kids are not monks who can meditate for hours a day, but they do the equivalent when they are involved in play, in deep, uninterrupted play.

children given so very many choices learn to undervalue them all, and hold out—always—for whatever elusive thing isn’t offered.