Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids
Kim John Payne M.Ed.amazon.com
Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids
What happens then, as we continue to deliver “everything their hearts desire”? For one thing, like well-exercised muscles, their little hearts keep desiring. But also, as all of this largesse pours in the front door, anticipation quietly slips out the back.
Kim John Payne M.Ed. • Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids
Only with less can a child learn what it is that they do like, and what speaks to them.
Kim John Payne M.Ed. • Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids
I worked further with Michelle and Clark to shift the balance of their communication with Carla from a vast majority of requests with a few instructions to mainly straightforward instructions with a few requests. When everything is a request, you have another form of verbal clutter:
Kim John Payne M.Ed. • Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids
“Mom, the girl who sits next to me in class, Marietta, is so stupid. Yesterday, she …” “We don’t use the word stupid in our family.” “But everyone uses the word stupid. It’s just a word!” “Some people do, and some don’t; but we don’t. When you grow up and have a family, you can decide whether your family will or not.”
Kim John Payne M.Ed. • Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids
As choices are reduced, pressure is lifted. A child has the time and freedom to have their own thoughts. They can find the ease to slowly forge an identity, an identity that is more than the sum of their choices, preferences, or purchases.
Kim John Payne M.Ed. • Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids
Requests may seem like “gentler” forms of communication, but with so many of them they’re very easy to ignore, and their uniformity make it hard for a child to know what’s really important.
Kim John Payne M.Ed. • Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids
“Taylor, time to get in the car and buckle up. Shut that door, please.” “I can’t drive with distractions.
Kim John Payne M.Ed. • Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids
We can provide the kind of stability and security that they will internalize, a base camp that doesn’t move.
Kim John Payne M.Ed. • Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids
The “clown parent” feels the need to be “larger than life,” an entertainer.