Relationships Are Coevolutionary Loops

people who were willing to assume complete personal responsibility for solving the problems in their relationships, and who felt a strong commitment to making their partners happy, not only reported the most satisfying and loving relationships at the time of initial testing, but their positive feelings seemed to increase over time.

Relationships that last over time acquire their own unique persona. There are two people (more if there are children) together who form the relationship, as well as each of these people on their own, as individuals. The relationship, or family, actually has a character of its own that may not accurately reflect the people in it. This composite and

Through this simple process of defining their needs, understanding how they are connected with the past, and then converting them into small, positive requests, they had turned their relationship into a self-sustaining vehicle for personal growth.