So I have to summon that little girl that knows how to tune into the affirming parts of life. I have to reach a hand out to the little girl that feels fiercely protective over herself. I imagine she would say:

“we are so special because we asked a question that we knew would feel good to be asked.”

“we are so special because we have a vision we... See more

I realize I may simply be asking the question because I want to answer it. I suspect something rotten about me and my intentions each time I ask a question. Maybe I am secretly very selfish. I have a memory I want to share and instead of just sharing it, I’m saying “you go first.” I’m not asking out of pure curiosity about the other person and this... See more

I realize I may simply be asking the question because I want to answer it. I suspect something rotten about me and my intentions each time I ask a question. Maybe I am secretly very selfish. I have a memory I want to share and instead of just sharing it, I’m saying “you go first.” I’m not asking out of pure curiosity about the other person and this... See more

I feel special in my depravity but every other feeling of “special” is a heavier lift these days.

I look back on the girl that thought something so ugly made her so special and I love her ardently.