Not Somebody Else's Guy

I’m realizing that so much of my existence was focused on outrunning what seemed to be a preordained fate of loneliness.

But part of getting to know yourself is to unknow yourself—to let go of the limiting stories you’ve told yourself about who you are so that you aren’t trapped by them, so you can live your life and not the story you’ve been telling yourself about your life.

In what ways have you yet to accept the fact that you are who you are, not the person you think you ought to be?

In what ways have you yet to accept the fact that you are who you are, not the person you think you ought to be?

“Love me for who I am” is the fateful rallying cry of all lovers headed for disaster. It is in reality a monstrously unfair—though entirely understandable—demand to be loved just as we are, with our panoply of faults, compulsions, neuroses, and immaturities. But with a modicum of self-awareness and honesty, we should only ever expect to be loved fo