No, you don't owe me a favor
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No, you don't owe me a favor
For this reason alone, we may be willing to agree to perform a larger favor than the one we received, merely to relieve ourselves of the psychological burden of debt. A Japanese proverb makes this point eloquently: “There’s nothing more expensive than that which comes for free.”
Robert B. Cialdini • Influence, New and Expanded: The Psychology of Persuasion
Although I appreciate the gesture, I’m not The Godfather! My help doesn’t come with strings attached. If I take the time to do something for you, it’s not because I’m a matcher looking for something in return. It’s because I aspire to be a giver—I enjoy being helpful. My effort to support you means that I think highly of you and might even care abo... See more
Superhuman
But if you give me something, that’s different because now I kind of feel like I owe you one. It could be a feeling of obligation, or you could say it’s a feeling of gratitude
Paul Millerd • The Pathless Path: Imagining a New Story For Work and Life
favor, I’d warn against minimizing the favor in all-too-common language that disengages the influence of the rule of reciprocation: “No big deal.” “Don’t think a thing about it.” “I would have done it for anybody.” Instead, I’d recommend retaining that (earned) influence by saying something such as,
Robert B. Cialdini • Influence, New and Expanded: The Psychology of Persuasion
"It's not about owing," Gennady said. He stepped back to look into Daniel's face. "That's so American; everything is debts and spending for you. It's not about owing, it's about what is necessary to move forward, like a roadway that comes to a river and you need a bridge or a ferry to cross. And if there is no bridge, no ferry, there's nowhere left... See more