and don’t have to take them on… I can be a sounding board for her and gently and firmly follow through and guide her where she needs to go. With this change in perception, I no longer

Most of the choices toddlers can’t comfortably make are about transitions.

But when we don’t make it clear that we are the loving leaders of the house by setting reasonable, consistent limits and taking control, our child has no choice but to feel out of control.

The manner in which we give directions will determine whether or not our children follow them.

Begin with a predictable environment and realistic expectations.

Be careful not to assume a child’s feelings: “You’re afraid of the dog”; or to invalidate the child’s response because we view it as overreaction:

Speak in first person.

reflect verbally (“You were upset about not getting another cracker.”), but don’t get upset or discouraged when your child has an emotional reaction to your limits.

A simple affirmation of our child’s struggles, “You are having a hard time getting those shoes on. You’re really working hard,” can give him the encouragement he needs to persevere through his frustration.