Let's Pretend This Never Happened

High school is life’s way of giving you a record low to judge the rest of your life by.

I assume this must be quite confusing for people whom I’ve communicated with only via e-mail and texts, since I can actually come across as reasonably witty and coherent in e-mail, because I have time to think about what a normal, filtered, mentally stable adult would write before I press “Send.”