Influence Is Your Superpower: How to Get What You What Without Compromising Who You Are

Having empathy doesn’t establish anything about who’s right or wrong. We’re just trying to understand each other as fellow human beings.

The passage of time depends on your frame of reference. If

If you’re trying to influence someone to do something that feels really big, it can help to start small.

System 2, on the other hand, is conscious and rational, like a judge who deliberates on one case at a time, listening to arguments and carefully weighing the evidence. We

Goldilocks strategy. You propose something you think will be ideal for the other person, along with one alternative that’s far less than you think they need and one that’s far more than you think they need.

better approach would be to gauge how they’re feeling by asking a hypothetical question that doesn’t lock them in. I call it a soft ask.[*]

If you’re holding back from asking because you want to be liked, consider that you’re not giving other people the chance to feel good about saying yes to you. And

you can shift your focus to the other person by making your listening goals more specific. The simplest goal is to listen for what they’re thinking. Try to hear the other person’s conscious thoughts instead of just your own. You’re

Questions are an easy way to transfer your focus from yourself to the other person. You can replace diminishers with questions, or you can ask the other person about themselves. We