Humble Inquiry, Second Edition: The Gentle Art of Asking Instead of Telling

TABLE 3.1 Diagnostic versus Confrontive Inquiry Diagnostic Inquiry Confrontive Inquiry Sense making Why do you suppose they were acting that way? Were they acting that way because they were scared? Feelings How did that make you feel? Didn’t that make you angry? Action-oriented What did you do? Why didn’t you say something about it? Systemic How we

Diagnostic inquiry steers the client’s thought process and conversation toward areas that the helper considers to be relevant to providing help. Confrontive inquiry not only influences the direction of the conversation but adds the helper’s own ideas, concepts, or advice as part of the question. Each type of inquiry influences the client to a diffe

Your Humble Inquiry attitude is displayed in how you ask, respond, and reveal yourself to other people.

Humble Inquiry is therefore most relevant when you find yourself in a conversation that is initially just transactional but develops into something more personal because one or both of you want it. The pivotal questions you can ask yourself are, “Do I want to maintain professional distance from this colleague?” or “Do I want to maintain social dist

Learning when to focus on identifying opportunities for Humble Inquiry is akin to becoming situationally aware. We need to recognize why we are engaging in a dialogue and what the cultural rules are for a positive conversation. In any conversation, what are you really trying to do? Perhaps you are seeking information about something you truly do no

When you are asked for advice, do you jump in with a response, pitching your solution? An alternative Humble Inquiry approach might start with asking why advice is needed, why it is needed now, why it is you who is being asked for advice. The context may be much more important than the content of your response.

An Art Humble Inquiry is the fine art of drawing someone out, of asking questions to which you do not already know the answer, of building a relationship based on curiosity and interest in another person. An Attitude Humble Inquiry is not just asking questions; it is a total attitude that includes listening more deeply to how others respond to our

Keeping up with the content of accelerating change is really hard. Naturally we all share the inclination to focus on what we know, on our industry, or on our area of expertise, where we can be comfortable keeping up with what is changing. Yet trying to keep up with the content of accelerating change may actually be less important than keeping up w