Missing days is morally neutral.

You don’t exist to serve your space; your space exists to serve you.

it. I came up with rituals that outlined exactly what I was to do in a room and exactly in what order.

Instead of “I need to finish this” or even “I need to start this,” begin to say to yourself, “How can I move towards this task?”

being messy is not a moral failing, tidy is simply a preference, organization is functional, and you deserve to function. How would your approach to functional organization change if you threw pretty out the window?

“This is a safe home and I am safe in it.”

Not everything has to be clean at the same time.

So throw away what you think care tasks “should” look like and work towards a way of doing them that works for you.

You do not have to earn the right to rest, connect, or recreate. Unlearn the idea that care tasks must be totally complete before you can sit down.