How to Be (Reasonably) Hard on Yourself

Identify perfectionist patterns. Before you can start embracing imperfection, you need to become aware of when and how you are unrealistically striving for perfection. If you feel stretched, write down your current commitments—all of them—and describe what success would look like for each. Challenge your unrealistic targets. Looking at the list of

Susan Piver, that helped me understand why. Honestly, the title was enough. It was ‘Getting stuff done by not being mean to yourself.’ Piver was another fan, in theory, of Chuck Close’s inspiration-is-for-amateurs philosophy. But she brilliantly evoked its unfortunate flipside, which is that it all too easily morphs into the barked internal command

But our self-improvement needs to come from a place of prior acceptance and joy of discovery and growth, rather than as a condition of self-worth. No person, performance, or product is going to be perfect; as the Law of Perfection states, excellence is the best we can

I am learning to show my mess. To manage my perfectionism I give myself tons of permission to do things that are good enough. I do things quickly (having two small children will teach you how to do most tasks at lightning speed), and if it’s good enough, it gets my stamp of approval. I have a few mantras that help: Quick and dirty wins the race. Pe

No need to be too hard on yourself. Hold yourself to a higher standard but not an impossible one. And forgive yourself if and when you slip up.