HOW TO ARGUE AND WIN EVERY TIME

The art of arguing is the art of living. We argue because we must, because life demands it, because, at last, life itself is but an argument.

Fear Is our ally. Fear confirms us. Fear Is energy that is convertible to power—our power. Fear is friend and foe alike, adversary and ally. Fear is painful. I hate its frequent companionship. Yet it challenges me. It energizes my senses. Like the sparrow, watching, watching, in the presence of fear I become alert.

From the moment we were born we have been conditioned to avoid confrontation. If we opened our tiny mouth to cry, a bottle was hastily used to muffle our cries. We've been taught, as puppies are taught: Don't bark! Thoroughly domesticated, we have been conditioned to comply, to remain silent, to plod on.

We begin to understand: Successful argument is a communication between the acknowledged authority of both parties to the argument. Moreover, that I argue concedes to the Other the right to argue back. That I speak and wish to be heard admits the Other's right to also be heard.

Winning is getting what we want, which often includes assisting others in getting what they want.

Good parenting opens minds. Good parenting encourages children to ask questions and provides the child with a guilt-free environment in which to bud and bloom.

I would rather have a mind opened by wonder than one closed by belief.

Self-interest, the impenetrable wall: When the Other realizes that his self-interest is at stake, no winning argument is possible. This is so because the core prejudice of any living creature, man or forest fern, is for its continued existence. No matter how skillfully we may argue, we cannot win when the Other is asked to decide against his self-i

The strongest structure for any argument is story. "Let me tell you a story." Storytelling has been the principal means by which we have taught one another from the beginning of time. The campfire. The tribal members gathered around, the little children peeping from behind the adults, their eyes as wide as dollars, listening, listening. T