If you feel a surge of envy, first, own up to it, Dr. Leahy said. “Making room for envy and noticing when it shows up allows people not to be afraid of it.”

It’s OK if you envy a friend, Dr. Leahy said. Your emotions are likely more complex. “You can think, I love my friend, I appreciate what they do for me and their good qualities, and I envy them,

within one’s judgments and envy of others, one can find the projections of what they most deeply fear and desire for their own life.