Healing the Shame That Binds You

Giving and receiving unconditional love is the most effective and powerful way to personal wholeness and happiness.

The Bible suggests that the origin of human bondage (original sin) is the desire to be other than who we are .

When we are exposed without any way to protect ourselves, we feel the pain of shame. If we are continually overexposed, shame becomes toxic.

The parenting rules used in most Western world families create massive shame. Add alcoholism, incest and physical abuse to these systems, and you get major dysfunctionality.

Shame begets shame.

Children will invest as much energy as is needed to ensure the preservation of family harmony, even if it means sacrificing themselves to do so by developing psychological disorders. —Joel Covitz Emotional Child Abuse

We cannot heal what we cannot feel.

He goes on to say that without feeling, nothing matters, and with feeling, anything can matter.

The major problem in our lives is to decide and clarify our responsibilities.

Another consequence of this emotional abandonment is the loss of a sense of self. When used as another’s narcissistic supplies, a person develops in such a way as to reveal only what is expected of him and ultimately fuses with his own act or performance. He becomes a “human doing” without any real sense of his authentic self.