Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life: The New Acceptance and Commitment Therapy

would prefer to go away).

We all carry painful hidden secrets. We tend to put on shiny, happy faces, pretending that everything is okay, and that life is “all good.” But it isn’t and it can’t be. To be human is to feel pain in ways that are orders of magnitude more pervasive than what the other creatures on planet Earth feel.

Those activities you would engage in if matters changed, represent a different kind of pain: they are called the pain of absence.

It is worth noting how much of the pain we feel is a focus of attention because it seems to interfere with other activities.

If your answer is yes, we are ready to begin. If it is not (remember: be honest), it would be worthwhile to know how deep your resistance to change may be, and it would be worth considering whether such resistance is in your best interest.

Experiential avoidance is the process of trying to avoid your own experiences (thoughts, feelings, memories, bodily sensations, behavioral predispositions) even when doing so causes long-term behavioral difficulties (like not going to a party because you’re a social phobic, or not exercising because you feel too depressed to get out of bed). Of all

Every time you engage in a behavior specifically designed to avoid some negative personal pain, you start the same set of reactions outlined in the questions above. You are likely to feel an immediate sense of relief from not having to deal with the painful thought, feeling, or bodily sensation. The sense of relief you gain reinforces your desire t

pain caused by the fact that your pain prevents you from living the kind of life you want to live. Now see if this next sentence is true for you: Generally, the more you live your life trying to ward off the pain of presence, the more pain you get, particularly in the form of the pain of absence.

When we are caught in a struggle with psychological problems we often put life on hold, believing that our pain needs to lessen before we can really begin to live again.

Not only must you deal with the immediate pain of your thoughts, feelings, and physical ailments, you also must deal with the